One Sunday after the usual sermon, the pastor asked everyone in the congregation to prepare for next week's sermon. He said the subject would be lying and that everyone needed to read the 17th chapter in the book of Mark. Everyone uttered a sound of approval. Next week after the congregational singing the preacher said,"If you read Mark 17 please raise your hand." And everyone in the congregation did. Then the preacher said, "Now I am ready to start my sermon on lying" And he stated "There is no Mark 17!!" Remeber to read your Bible and to never lie to the preacher! God Bless!
At Sunday School they were teaching how God created everything, including human beings. Little Johnny seemed especially intent when they told him how Eve was created out of one of Adam's ribs. Later in the week his mother noticed him lying down as though he was ill, and said, "Johnny, what is the matter?"
Little Johnny responded, "I have pain in my side. I think I'm going to have a wife."
A little girl pointed to a Bible on her mother's bookshelf that was never opened, and said to her mother, "Whose book is that?"
Her mother quite startled by her daughters question replied, "Why honey, don't you know? That is God's book!"
The child demonstrating that she had a very practical turn to her mind said, "Don't you think that we had better give it back to him? No one around here ever reads it."